2003-03-04 - 1:57 p.m.
april 3
after work today i went to all state to get a quote from them. 4,579 dolla. by far the highest i have gotten yet! i just had to laugh. i cant believe the state of nj thinks i can offord that!
after that i went to sanctuary to watch deb read tarot. all i really wanted to do was bitch and moan and play with her tarot deck. what i got was much worse. her and anne kept telling me things that i can not wrap my head around. such as i am spreading myself in too many directions. well how do you stop that? and that each of my tarot readings have been the same for a very long time. mostly it always goes back to the boyfriend thing. its not easy to meet people. i work in a daycare. so unlesss i start mackin it to married men i am shit out of luck there. and i havent seen anyone at a bar that has intereseted me or at a club in a very long time. not liek i am going to meet the love of my life at those places either. i really do believe that the people you meet fall into your lap. you meet them at work, or from a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend. you knwo what i mean? its hardly any time where you meet someone randomly at a bar or a club.
i think all in all that i left sanctuary feeling worse than i did. in my mind the only thing getting me down was my car insurance but in others minds i seem to be worse off than that. but no one can really tell me how to fix that. and i cant really fix it because i dont really understand what the hell i am feeling right now. it was just a really confusing evening. i left feeling a bit bruised.
after that i went to time to eat with robbie and kellyann. robbie managed to spill a HUGE glass of water all over me. it looked like i pissed my pants. but at least we all got a laugh.
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